oh man, it's been almost a year. 10 months since i posted the last time. and now i have the desire to summarize shortly what has happened. i've had a really good time, but as always there's no happy end, at least regarding relationships with men (well, and regarding other issues, to be honest).
three months ago my ex broke up with me because he apparently did not see a future for us and it occurs to him that his feelings were not strong enough. three days ago i met him again, plus a woman who is obviously his new girlfriend. aargh. i imagine that he probably had not just met her recently. whatever, i don't know this, but it sucks anyway.
it all started with an affair a year ago and then got more serious and in the end it evolved into a relationship.
i have to mention who he is: my former room mate, with whom i lived together for 1 and a half year. i never never had thought before that the two of us could possibly start going out or anything like that, but then it happened when his long-term relationship was going to pieces. looking back: an ominous start. but somehow it felt very good and it felt better than ever before as we became not only lovers but companions.
i had a good time anyway. we started going swimming at least once a week together. i went out to party a lot, either with him or with friends or both. and i got in touch with all the crazy guys from my past again (i love you!).
in april i moved to another part of the city. moving turned out to be a long, stressful and painful (and i mean that in a literal sense) process. will not go into detail here. now i'm glad to live here at my new place, although there are so many memorable experiences linked to my old apartment. it was time. the new apartment is smaller but nicer, and i share it, as before, with two other people.
when the whole moving thing was over, i was still in pain and then finally prognosed with another slipped disc (bandscheibenvorfall). at that time i had already been in love for a while. i wanted more, he did not. that's life. now i hate him. i wish i could turn back time, so that he would remain my ex room mate, not my ex boyfriend.
right now i still struggle with pain in my back and left leg, although i've been through cortison infusions, physical therapy and acupuncture. now i slowly start playing volleyball again and also try to go swimming regularly.
since last summer, i've been working in a pub once a week, with quite demanding, partly heavy-drinking and predominantly male clients, who are all nice but sometimes just drive me crazy.
i'm still studying. i plan to graduate next spring, but have no idea if i can make it up until this time.
reading over this post, i notice that it sounds pretty depressing. hmmmm.
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